yes never better.

but the minuet you followed his familiar face into his carriage, you see him as someone to fill the gap, the gap opened up every time you step in public brought on by self doubt and pure overwhelming confusion to this world. why dose you head have to be so fucking messed up? you despise normal people sure, but did you ever stop and think it would be so much easier being one of them instead of trying to Analise every little thing. you care too much about nothing.
you end up going home with him, he treats you like a princess, every girls dream. hes kind. hes lonely as well. two lonely souls so much in common. you him your not just a fuck.
you catch a train to the city the next day and he leaves you by yourself. you don't want to be alone just yet. but your find yourself sitting on a bench in the middle of the city so alone. alone and surrounded by hundreds of people. The crowds get to you, and once more your loneliness gets the best of you. the sickly feeling of fear joins it, your always afraid. always afraid of people, scared at a quick view they well see right past the big glasses you don't need and the beanie covering your hair because its rank, it hasn't seen home for days. they will see past the big hand bag and the makeup you have been packing on over the past three days. your frightened they will see past all this stuff and see you. and the only reason this scares the shit out of you is because if these people can work out who you are in a single glance, how the fuck can you spend hours glaring into the mirrors at home, cheeks stained with blacked tears and still not know you you are.